Fun Picture Stuff

  

ESL for Beginners

If you're not laughing outloud (LOL as the kids these days say it) at this, which I found from Alon, well then my friend, you are truly dead inside.

$43.06 well spent

A Series of Unfortunate Events

My first mistake was going to Ritz to develop my two rolls of pictures, even though they do the best job below an independent lab.

My second mistake was getting the pictures put on CDs.

My third mistake was handing over my debit card, even after they said it was going to be charged $43.06 for two rolls of film and CDs.

This began a chain of events in the College Area shopping center that ended in me standing in line at Vons for half an hour. Let me add, this is the SECOND TIME IN A ROW this has happened to me at Vons. The lady in front of me has an item with no price (how this happens at a grocery store is beyond me). After finding the price she goes through three credit cards, trying to find one that works (can we say "stolen"?).

Finally it's my turn. I should have known I was doomed when the checker asked me if I was buying a broccoli crown or an entire head. What? Isn't this your job to know? I chose the option I thought would be cheaper - last time I checked I never received a diploma in produce idenification. Unfortunately, mistake number two here was to purchase yet another item from the produce section: grapes. Grapes are apparently hard to mistake for green bell peppers, which is what I was rung up for at $20 a pound, or some price that was obviously not meant for grapes. In the process of voiding the price, Checker of the Month for July voided everything. Each item had to be taken out of their respective shopping bags and re-scanned.

One hour, six boxes of pectin, some poorly disguised pepper grapes, 10 pounds of sugar, 60 very expensives 4x6 pictures, and a dinner later, I was able to leave the parking lot and vow to never enter another Vons again. Until I get hungry in a few days.

In Your Dreams!

So apparently one of two things has happened:

1. Elle, just like Tamara, is obsessed with me.
2. Elle is pregnant and therefore experiencing some sort of hallucinogenic dream world where I am the main character.

In her words:

Okay, so I had an exceedingly weird dream last night . . . I was you. Never you mind that it all took place in my Bethel cubicle.– I somehow knew, in that dream cycle way of knowing, that I was Katie Gardner, working at Amor Ministries. At night. For some sort of event, which I think included either a sleepover or an EARLY morning start so people were sleeping over. Because I'm sitting at my desk working (Alon came in, etc.) and then decide that now it is time to go to bed (and suddenly I'm wearing button-down flannel pajamas) so I push back my chair, snag my ready-and-waiting pillow and blankie, and lie down beneath my desk. But there'’s this funny air blowing on the back of my neck, and I can't figure out what it is, so I start hunting around, and finally realize that Doug (as much as I know what he looks like) is lying behind me, sleeping, in almost matching flannel PJs. Yes, under my desk, too. And I had not beforehand noticed this, even though I'’d been working at aforementioned desk only two minutes earlier. That was the end of said dream.

I would like to make a STRONG point that this dream was not based on actual events and any resemblance to people, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

It's All in the Tags

A funny thing happened when I posted the above picture on Flickr. One of the tags I added just happened to be "peeing" because hello, they were pretending to do so. Obviously this is not the case since we were in the middle of the bridal party pictures with PARENTS involved. (As a side note, the only reason they did this was to one-up the girls for cleverly coming up with this pose for Emily - it's tradition, and you can't abandon tradition just because you're dressed in a bride's maid dress to hide the fact that you are, at heart, NOT a lady.

However, this picture has received more hits than any of the other wedding pictures in the set, which is ludicrous to me. Have you seen this hottness?! I'm sure all the sick-os searching on Flickr were highly disappointed when they came to a wedding picture that was obviously posed. They wanted inappropriateness and darn it, I'm not giving it to them! (I wouldn't want to stain my record as an upstanding citizen in the Flickr community.)

Though, upon five minutes of introspection, I do realize that I did choose to put a tag entitled "peeing" on the picture in the first place. Maybe in the end, I am the sick-o. Sigh.

There's a whole lot more where this came from

Photo Cult

We've only just begun . . . that's really more fun if you sing it.

Oh the joy of spam

Just recently I received a personal e-mail (I say personal because it came into my Outlook as blue text instead of black, denoting that this e-mail was supposedly sent *only* to me) from Wilfred Burgos with the subject "0NK". I'm pretty sure since I accidentally opened it that I'm downloading a virus to myself and probably the rest of the office network, but I suppose time will tell.

Them most important part of this entire e-mail is the content it held for me. Really, I believe it's a work of literary genius, one even Tracy Michaels would stand before, jaw agape, swooning at the sheer beauty of it all.

"No comment!" I said, trying to keep the back of my head to the camera.
heaven from where they stand! Jon, they can't see their own wingtips! Stay They washed us in three different boiling vats and in their alkaline straight down, wings full out and stable from the moment he passed fifty

I think my favorite part is the way it just ends - no punctuation, no ending thought.

Epic.

My New BFF

Assuming anyone chooses to read the random rants of my life, and due to the fact that I made of goal of writing once a week, I've decided to actually re-embark on this blog journey . . .

And for my first post in over a month, I'd like to delve into the story of my new best friend, thanks to Tamara. (see picture below of BFF; AKA: Best Friend Forever)



My new BFF, "Viv" as she lets me call her, has a sense for fun, flare, and fantastic-ness. As Tamara and I were leisurely sitting at the Kensington Coffee Shop, enjoying our iced coffee and talking about pets (pets that like to crap all over Tamara's bedroom floor, for that matter), Tamara noticed how much she loved the dog in the lap of the women behind us, and proceeded to tell her so. This undoubtedly started what would soon into the beginning of a beautiful friendship . . .

time elapsed . . .

Tam starts taking pictures of me (as Tam likes to do, most likely because she knows I hate having a camera thrust in my face, and partially to do with the fact that Tam is a little obsessed with me). Suddenly during our little photo shoot, I felt an arm around my shoulders and hair in my face. I was a bit confused at first, and when I saw it was Viv (note: I didn't know her name until after this encounter), uncomfortable laughter ensued (see picture above).

Now, since Viv and I were such good friends, she proceeded to introduce Tam and I to the "lovely young gentleman" sitting one table over. (note: she did not know this lovely young gentleman until she introduced him to us) So, not only do Tam and I have new friend #1, but now we have new friend #2. Adam? I'm not sure - we're not exactly BFF in the same way that Viv and I are. Regardless, her (who we believed to be) husband and daughter made a comment on how they're sticking with the plan of not letting Viv outside again.

The moral of this story is such: don't go out with Tam unless you expect:

1) adventure
2) strange and mysterious people to approach you
3) digestive problems (I can't explain this one. It probably has something to do with our poor choice in food each time we're together.)
4) laughter